Rats... Drats... Blah...

I am sick and pissed.

Seriously, I’ve been ranting a lot over the weekend. More problems are coming my way, and my worries can’t seem to “stay put” even for a while. I am constantly bombarded with things I do not want to do. The pressure is on, but I can barely assert myself. All I can do is complain… Rant, rant, rant…

I seriously do not want to start working. But I have to, since my parents have been so darn responsible enough to take care of me and my brother’s future!!! Argh, now I have to take care of what, my brother’s 45thousandish-per-sem tuition??? Plus they are forcing me to get a job so we can get a loan for a new car. I love my parents, but this is too much for me right now…

Argh, I have a life.. and I know I have worked my ass off so I can relax after.. But no, I’m stuck with being the “great” ate that I am… I am going to burst.. I am.. Just wait and see…

I want to get out… I don’t want to worry bout anything.. But since I am so financially incapable right now (no school, no allowance policy) I cannot fend for myself… Come to think about it, my 150 a day allowance was just enough when I was in school…. Leaves me with no spare “change”… Ang galing ng magulang ko.. kahit anong gawin ko walang lusot…..

Then there’s rehearsals for the play.. It may be tiring, but at least for a few hours, I am actually enjoying what I am doing. Singing (totally) is one “relaxing” thing.. Kahit sandali.. Feel ko I am transported to some world that is my own…

I am honestly miserable that I won’t be able to join my org, Comm Res Soc in our sem-ender.. I am really miserable.. I’ve been crying… a lot…. (sniff)

Left some “friendships” unattended, and now I am miserable… Di ako mapakali.. Nakakaiyak… Nakakainis… Nakakaiyak…

I miss my friends… All of them.. (sniff)

I want a vacation!!! With no chaperones, no one to bug me about work and money… (sniff…)