Catharsis

i love you... shucks...

Happy Birthday Kitchie!

tomorrow I am: going to katips for a 9am interview
a wedding singer at the UP Parish

Singer friends have been calling me up for the past week. The constant and redundant question was: “Kumakanta ka pa ba?”

A good friend and professor saw me the other day from my Psych class. He asked the same question.

I said no. I don’t do it professionally anymore for reasons that I have Comm Res to finish and I really can’t focus on singing and studying at the same time. I had to give up one. And sadly, I gave up one passion. Singing.

It may sound absurd, but singing and studying are both my passion. I feel a satisfying rush whenever I engage in these “activities”

I’ve been singing since I was 5. I’ve been good with academics at the same stage. For the earlier part of my life, these two have been inseparable

I have no intentions to sound proud, but I have excelled in both fields. During my high school years I have been an honor student while balancing my singing career. I could say that I was reaching the peak. I had singing engagements left and right, a very active social life and good grades and trophies under my belt. But all these changed during sophomore year.

I didn’t have the time to do both things. I didn’t suck with time management. It was just that 24 hours was not enough to hold all my activities. All the stress had finally taken its toll on my body. I was sick for 3 weeks.

I also had to wear braces. Nobody likes singers with braces. In this capitalist world, even talent has to sell and rake in the money. Talent is just a part of package, the sad part – sometimes people have to be more than beautiful. This wasn’t going to work for me.

I was in a relationship that wouldn’t let me be me. I was happy yet not content. Inconsistent – yes. But sometimes “love” works in mysterious ways (ehehe)

I had to decide on what should I prioritize first. And the answer was clear (back then…) Finish school.

My career would not go anywhere as long as I had this metal things stuck to my teeth

After a year and half, I look back. I don’t know if I should regret things. There are things I couldn’t have possibly learned if I was still living in that previous lifestyle. But I left my other passion. Sayang.



Snap. Snap.

Sabi nila sayang. I was near the top of everything. I had developed my own style as such an early age. I was good at it, and I knew it.

Practice makes perfect. Practice makes perfect performances. We’ve all heard that phrase sometime in our lives. And yes, it makes sense. So, now you do the math. What happens if I don’t sing (continuously and professionally) for the next year and half?

I want and need to sing. I love music. I enjoy the attention (di ako nagmamalinis). I enjoy seeing people smile. I like making people happy. I like singing wherever, may it be in church, in the shower or whatever. My reasons for singing may be selfish or not, but it runs in my veins. And it will forever run in my veins.

(maybe…)